Thursday, January 3, 2008


Having reviewed the carnage of Quadra’s OCP revisions and seen the juggernaut of subdivisions advance inexorably up and around the Comox Valley, I would propose a more cost-effective and less rancorous method of ramming growth down our throats.

I would respectfully suggest that you fire the planning department, hire my Labrador Retriever and then disband.

This suggestion has several advantages.

By attaching a rubber stamp to each of my dog’s feet and scattering appropriate paperwork on the floor, and then letting him run loose, development approvals can occur four times more quickly.

I have already trained my dog to roll over and play dead when a developer approaches.

My dog will work for peanuts---er, kibble.

My dog has keen hearing, so that unlike town councilors and district reps, if he falls asleep in chambers, he will still hear what is happening around him.

My dog has no interest in taking expensive junkets to other cities at taxpayers’ expense; in fact, he avoids any mode of transportation where he can’t stick his head out the window. I would be happy to lend my old car out to the RD for official purposes.

When the election approaches, my Lab won’t have to waste time kissing the butts of business people and developers. A simple sniff on the way by is usually enough for him, and then he gets on with his business.

Finally, when the regional district needs to expropriate property, it usually involves considerable work and expense. In contrast, when my dog marks his territory, no lawyers are involved and his territory can still revert easily to the original owners. This would give us a leg up on legal bills.

I ask that you paws and give this suggestion serious consideration. Out of concern for taxpayers, it surely is the leash you can do

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